Common Marriage Problems That Lead To Unhappy Marriage It’s very common that all marriages gone through good and bad both times. Some people are good at managing both times but few are not good at dealing with bad times. While some marriage problems can easily be resolved, others may be tough to tackle and could even signal the beginning of a marriage’s end.
Overstepping boundaries
Once couples are married, it’s very common for one spouse to try and change their partner. Whether it’s their fashion sense or their fundamental beliefs, trying to change your spouse is a personal invasion, and when it happens, the victimized spouse will feel disrespected, hurt, or even angry.
What you can do about it: To avoid invasion, know where to draw the line when it comes to pushing for change.
Lacking complete communication.
When spouses fail to practice proper communication, it’s easy for them to fall into a habitual way of ineffectively speaking to one another. What’s worse is that if poor communication skills are not dealt with, it’s possible for more serious problems to arise.
What you can do about it: Couples should learn how to communicate clearly without fight and argument with one another to keep their love life on track and also prevent these unnecessary issues.
Letting things go in the bedroom
While there are many reasons why couples lose interest in sexual intimacy or struggle with physical affection, it’s important for spouses to find ways to keep their sex life fresh and fulfilling.
Unfortunately, there’s a vicious cycle when it comes to sex: It’s hard to want to have it when you feel emotionally detached, but it’s hard to feel emotionally attached without physical intimacy.
What you can do about it: To get past a dry spell couple, need to identify problem areas in their marriage and work through them to become physically comfortable with each other.
Wandering focuses
Another common issue couples face is a shift in focus after marriage. When either spouse redirects their attention from the relationship to other interests — be it a career, children, friends, or other social activities or hobbies — it’s common for their partner to feel the brunt of the situation, and for the relationship to suffer from a loss of attention.
What you can do about it: Instead of taking it personally, understand that your partner has won you and is now pursuing other challenges in life. Find a happy medium for your relationship to grow and support one another’s ambitions.
Emotional Infidelity
As unfortunate as it may be, once couples get married, it’s not uncommon for them to become emotionally disconnected from one another. When this happens, it’s likely that at least one spouse’s needs will become unmet, and so they may start looking elsewhere to feel fulfilled. This is where emotional “infidelity” has the opportunity to slip into the marriage.
What you can do about it: In order to prevent infidelity of any kind, couples must be clear on what they both consider cheating to be. Initially, partners may not have the same feelings towards what does and don’t count as cheating, but getting on the same page will lessen the chances of them allowing it to happen. It’s also important that spouses remain supportive of one another’s emotional needs because when these are met, they won’t have as much interest in looking elsewhere.
Fighting about money
Discussing finances with your spouse can be stressful and tense, especially if the couple has different spending habits or ways of managing money. In these types of edgy situations, it’s common for the conversation to become less about money and more about personal values and habits. For example, when one spouse is stressed about the money they may be less patient and more irritated in general. They may even pick fights with their partner about unrelated things without realizing it.
What you can do about it: To avoid this issue, be sure that you and your spouse are on the same page when it comes to dollars and cents. Make a financial plan together and skip any unnecessary disagreements by staying focused on the situation at hand.
Waning appreciation for one another
When appreciation between married partners decreases, conflict tends to rise. When this happens, couples tend to become bitter or agitated with one another.
What you can do about it: When those once small, yet loving unexpected gestures become expected, they lose their magic and become a chore rather than a choice. Whether you’ve been with your spouse for 12 months or 12 years, it’s important to keep appreciating one another for the things you both do.
Technology interference
Let’s say, for example, a wife becomes so wrapped up with her smartphone that she’s texting her pals at the dinner table instead of engaging in conversation with her husband. Or, perhaps a husband is so fixed on his tablet that all he wants to do after dinner is play games on it and browse Facebook. These situations can replace healthy communication and even intimacy. It may sound bizarre, but they’re real-life issues.
Let’s say, for example, a wife becomes so wrapped up with her smartphone that she’s texting her pals at the dinner table instead of engaging in conversation with her husband. Or, perhaps a husband is so fixed on his tablet that all he wants to do after dinner is play games on it and browse Facebook. These situations can replace healthy communication and even intimacy. It may sound bizarre, but they’re real-life issues.
What you can do about it: Take an honest look at your technology habits. If technology is taking priority over your marriage, it’s time to snap yourself back to reality.
Selfishness
If one spouse acts selfishly and consistently places their own needs and desires ahead of their spouse’s, then it’ll only be a matter of time until the neglected spouse feels unworthy and unloved. At its worse, selfishness is controlling, manipulative, jealous, possessive, and abusive. In milder forms, it can be seen in a lack of consideration and respect.
What you can do about it: In order to prevent issues of selfishness in marriage, spouses must learn how to act with empathy and create a balance between both their own and their spouse’s needs.
Lack of trust
Trust is the very basis of love, and without it a healthy marriage cannot exist. When a spouse cheats, lies or breaks a promise, it can really hurt the relationship.
What you can do about it: Restoring trust in a marriage where someone has been betrayed is no easy task, and both spouses must be committed to fixing the relationship in order to have any success in moving past the issue. If the issues are not dealt with, the betrayed spouse will continue to feel hurt, anger, and suspicious.
Uncontrolled anger
While it’s normal for married couples to get angry with each other from time to time, it’s important that both spouses act appropriately when these types of situations arise.
What you can do about it: Instead of reacting explosively with outbursts or fits of rage, couples need to address the issue at hand (stay on topic), keep calm, and consider one another’s feelings. It’s also important that couples listen, openly express their opinions, and avoid defensive behaviors.
Changing ambitions
Most of the time, when couples decide to get married they’re on the same path and have discussed their wants for the future. That said, a common issue between spouses is when one or both partners change their minds and come up with new plans or ambitions as time passes.
What you can do about it: While there’s no reason to harass your spouse or worry that they will change their mind down the road, it’s important to keep communication lines open to avoid shocking surprises of this kind.
